Fill the tank

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I am fucking exhausted.

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I’ve been going for too long, too many things on my plate, too many wrenches, too many curveballs, too much time away from my bed, too much stress.

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But I don’t think that’s not why I’m drained. I think I’m this exhausted because I haven’t done a good enough job in filling the tank. Fuel is having fun, fuel is reading a good book, fuel is writing, fuel is drawing, fuel is music, fuel is a quiet coffee in the morning, fuel is no plans. Fuel is finding more fuel.

Ephemeral

Things aren’t supposed to last forever. I know, I know… we ( the cultural we ) want them to. But no matter how hard we fight, it’s not supposed to.

I’m liking this trend to delete what you’ve made. The most recent,twitterspirit. It reminds me of life: conversations I can’t remember, forgetting where I put my keys, enjoying a moment because it’s fleeting.

And in the fleeting – we take time to share, the time to learn. We make an effort to engage our memory. We pass down stories and skills. We teach our children. We create an impression, and that impression is what should last.

creative commons featured image courtesy of stuartpilbrow

Rose Coloured Glasses

While I’m a big fan of Prismatic, I feel there’s something missing.

It’s refining, and refining, and refining what I read and what I want to read, but lately it’s feeling very one sided – my techie geek/start-up side. It’s perfectly understandable why, and I’m not going to say it’s wrong. But…

I am more than that. I think we are all more.

As websites strive to refine our behaviours they don’t account for the anomalies in our lives. They will never be able to create an algorithm for our Guilty Pleasures where we step outside of dominant patterns, and of course look over our shoulders, “Is anyone watching?”

They assume we always look at the world with the same rose coloured glasses – but our patterns can be more complex then that.

  • I might love techno pop when I’m feeling at my lowest.
  • I might watch RomCom’s when my partner is away on her businesss trips
  • I might need an article about art & design when I’m stumped on finding a solution
  • I might quietly love an argument, wanting opposing views to be pissed at

These things can’t be quantified or algorithm-ed. These are the pockets that make us unique, make us dynamic & distinct, make us human.